I have to admit that I'm jealous of people who swim in potentially polluted bodies of water.

I usually don't because I imagine myself living some horrible carcinogenic nightmare in my old age as a consequence, but if I had been swimming in said bodies for the 50 odd years I have left before joining the senior ranks, I would have had 50 odd more years of swimming, assuming the carcinogens didn't take me out earlier.

Perplexion.